So the questions of the month have been "So how is married life treating you guys?" "Where did you go on your honeymoon?" "Are you planning to have kids?" I'm not sure that I can answer any of those questions to the relative satisfaction of the (many) people who asked them. But there is goes.

So how is married life treating "you guys"? We'll I can't speak for us "guys" (like we're not real individual people anymore), but so far, we are trying to get used to referring to each other as "wife" and "husband". "Wife" and "husband" are words that do not readily enter one's vocabulary in the first person after 30+ single years. I'm sure some people might be troubled about that, but considering that we have been sharing our lives for 3+ years now, the state of holy matrimony has not been overwhelming. Frankly, I'm kinda bummed that we're not living in sin anymore. How is sex supposed to be interesting when it's not a sin? Maybe we'll just have some satanic sex to make up for the "Leave it to Beaver" stigma that has enveloped us. I mean really, c'mon you guys. Grow up!! We're happy as ever. It's not bliss. It's life. We love each other. Sometimes it's great, and sometimes it's not so great. Heaven has not descended to fill our house, and honestly, if it did, I would ask that it go back to whatever myth it came from. We are living life. We don't want or need help from some myth.

Where did we go for our honeymoon? Honestly, that sounds like some question that belongs to a fairy tale. We got married at Burning Man. It was a blissfully hot and dusty place with the most incredible art that I've ever seen. Fuck the Louvre and all that stuff in Europe. It might have been great back in the day, but that was long ago. I've seen most of it, and I am here to tell you that Burning Man is at least three centuries ahead. It is uncivilized art; pure and unfettered by mandates of the church and society. Having a wedding at Burning Man was like a wedding and honeymoon all rolled into one, and without stupid drama because everyone was busy having too much fun. I am truly sorry that most of the people reading this couldn't make it. Maybe next year you'll learn how to live.

Are we planning on having kids? No. When we feel we're complete people in our own right, then maybe we'll think about adopting some child from China. I think the world has all the Americans it needs, and certainly enough greenhouse gas too.

Other than "married life" (like it is somehow different from normal life), I started a job at San Quentin. It's a job that pays well. I go from cell to cell and make sure no one feels like killing themselves. I find it incredibly ironic that I should ask inmates on death row if they feel like killing themselves. I suppose this irony must be lost on the bureaucrats who wrote this policy. It almost sounds like a Dilbert cartoon, doesn't it? Perhaps I should write him. Anyway, this ridiculous task pays me more than I've ever made as a pysch nurse, so if it bugs you taxpayers out there, call Arnold, the Governor of "Kelly-phone-ya." When he's done beating up on the nurses and firefighters, perhaps he can figure out the purpose for my job. He certainly isn't living up to his Terminator persona. That's showbiz.

Rant complete. Now I sleep. 10-10-05